I tend to be very careful when people tell me that they are just being realistic. Sometimes those claiming to be realistic are actually being pessimistic but may not want to admit so. I am not saying there is no such thing as being realistic, but in most cases we fall into two categories: those who are realist-optimists or those who are realist-pessimists. Which one are you?

Are you inclined to thinking more about the worst-case scenarios, preoccupying your mind with the 1000 ways something may not work? You have probably been in planning meetings where someone quickly expresses serious concerns about a plan and tells you how the plan wouldn’t work but without any suggestion on how it may work. I hope that is not you. While the reality is obvious, great achievers do not focus on reality. They focus on possibilities instead. If you want to see how everything will play out perfectly before you start, you may as well stop trying.

What we all need is the big picture; the mental image of the best-case scenario that we are aiming for. Although we face the facts of life and the challenges (the realities) on the way to success, we do not allow them to distract us from the end-in-view. Those who focus on the worst-case scenario, who, in the name of being realistic, dwell on the negatives, will always be defeated. Success is a mindset. Whatever anyone becomes or whatever becomes the outcomes of one’s endeavour, the individual chooses them based on their state of mind.
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Anyone desiring great achievements in life must continually think positively about great things. You cannot create a future for yourself that you have never imagined. Get rid of the negative thoughts. The worst-case scenario is not your scenario. Think possibilities. Think big. Achieve big.

We go through different moments in life. We have the highs and the lows of life, and many stages in-between. When we are having the mountaintop experience, it is typical to see many people around us, who help to share the joy. Human beings are naturally inclined to sharing good times with you. When you are successful and have a lot to give, you will enjoy the patronage of most people.

However, only a few people will stay with you when the water gets troubled. The best time to know who your true friends are is a time of need, lack or trouble. Those who truly love you will stay with you and provide you their shoulders to lean on. Those who were there just for the abundantly lavish moment will vanish into thin air. They will either turn their back on you or just become passive.

Where am I going with this? It is one of my life philosophies that “you are mostly useful if you are available when you are mostly needed”. Look around you and within your circle. Are there people that you have forgotten or have withdrawn from at their times of need? The way to prove your friendship or whatsoever connection you have with others is to show up when they need you. That is when it matters the most.
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If you always show up only when things are good, rosy, and beautiful, what benefit would that be? If you give your friend a shoe when they already have five shoes, that is okay. But remember to show up with a can of milk when they do not have any. Do not turn your back on, or withdraw from, the people you have shared good times with, especially when their situation changes. Let us look for those in our lives and in our community whose hands we can hold. Show up when it matters the most.

You probably know that this is the time of the year when those who didn’t set their goals before the end of last year work hard at it. Some are still setting goals while others are already accomplishing them. It doesn’t matter where you are at. What matters is that that you set goals and then achieve them. Without goals, targets, aims, or ambitions, there will be no success.

Meanwhile, we don’t just set goals for goal-setting’s sake. When you are setting your goals, you need to ask yourself why you want what you want. Why did you set that goal? What is your overarching purpose for the goals your are setting? If your goal is to conquer Mount Everest this year, you may need to ask yourself why you would do that. If you are targeting a net-worth of $25 million, what would be the purpose?

It is no news that many people fall by the wayside on their journey to achieving their goals. Among many possible factors, lack of enthusiasm or loss of passion is a reason people drop out. And, you know what? People lose passion when they engage in activities that do not align with a compelling vision / dream. Someone would generally develop enthusiasm when their goals are positioned within something bigger and more meaningful.
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That makes me think that each one of us need a GPS – Goal Positioning System. The GPS is your ultimate life’s purpose or life’s dream upon which your life goals are based. When you have a compelling reason for your goals, you will develop the passion to achieve them. Update your GPS, set your goals, develop a plan, and get to work.

Until another time,
Dele Ola, Award-Winning Author of Be A Change Agent
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